the other day someone said something to me that just irked me.
“Its just anxiety that you are going through.”
Now this person is a loved one and has been having major problems with my diagnosis. They read my blog sometimes and I just wanna say: ITS NOT JUST ANXIETY!
I know y’all have that someone in your life that just won’t except your diagnosis. Well, in my life I have 3….that I live with. One of whom blames my issues on the pills I take, one of whom – like I said – believes its just anxiety and lastly one whom thinks I don’t have enough faith.
All three I think believe that, though that could be my paranoia talking.
Lemme explain something………if only I could explain something. Ya see, I can’t my brain is racing. I cant stop to think to make sense. Definitely not anxiety. Skin crawling at the thought of someone touching you….not anxiety. Ya know what I could go on about what I have and how its not anxiety but I wont.
I dont want this post complaining about what y’all – my ninjas – already go through. We don’t need a reminder of how alone we are. Of how much we do pray but we still go through the many symptoms of bipolar disorder. Of how we just need support and not judgement. Of how we take our meds sometimes and they stop working. Of how we are judged by other people because we don’t act sick enough.
Come to me when you have to control your urges to go out dancing in your yard in your nightgown or you accuse your mother of hitting on your husband (Yeah great moments of mania for me). Come to me when you wanna die because the evil magentas are just too much for you. Why? I will support you no matter what. Love, hope, joy everything.