So I haven’t been writing.

So little in fact that WordPress sent me an email saying they missed me – which is highly unlikely since I don’t do nothing for them.

But maybe you guys missed me.

Basically what I’m saying is I’ve been trying. Trying to live a meager existence here and it’s kinda working….that is until we went to Mexico.

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I took this trip with all hopes that I would enjoy it by the time I got there. I kinda did. I will admit that. I got on a Mexican bus and travelled outside the resort walls. But it was like ok now what.

I hate depression. It steals so much from me.

Right now I’m sitting in my pdoc’s office – I don’t know what to write. I’m on the verge of tears for the past coupla days and have suicidal intrusive thoughts. I don’t want to be here.

God please help me why am I feeling this way right now? Why can’t I shake this?

I cheated so badly on my diet, while we were in Mexico. Maybe that’s why I’ve been stuck in the depths of despair. I haven’t even exercised yet either.

Managed to hurt myself somehow. I’ve done nothing but homeschooling since I got back so figure that one out. Sigh.

I don’t even know where I was going with this.

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