I’m back (heres part one) and Well – he ain’t my new psychiatrist.

Shocking right?

I got there and literally spent an hour filling out paper work. As I did, I saw several patients come in. Not to be judgmental….I’m gonna be.

They were all scary, ragey, rapey looking thieves.

Wha?

I know I’m wrong.

Then came in this family. The oldest looked like a Beyonce wannabe reject and the mother looked so desperately tired. Her and I hit it off; of course.

Then she went in with one of her kids while her oldest stood outside with the youngest doing the best impression of a horrible human being I have ever seen.

20 minutes later the mother comes out grumbling “never. Never again. Nuh-uh. My kids are too bad”

Yeah I was so lookin forward to talkin to him.

It went fine – except for a coupla short responses and questions that made it obvious he wasn’t listening.

Then….oh here’s the best part. Then came the part where he gives me a prescription for an antipsychotic (cause my diagnosis changed yet again) ; and asks: do you have a history of Parkinson’s or breast cancer in your family?

After explaining that I do have both in my family, he says “oh don’t worry. This medicine just increases your chances but its such an unlikely chance you would get it cause of secondary family….don’t worry.” And then the suhckah has the nerve to make me sign a paper that I understood the chances.

Oh wait – please. Let me jump at the opportunity to sign that!

Jerk.

Then, I told him how I wasn’t gonna see him again and kinda the reason why (I blamed it on the husband. so sue me) and how does he respond?

“I’ll see ya in 10 days”

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Great listening skills genius.

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