Ya know there are a lot of things I think about.

I’m quite profound – really.

Economics (I really don’t know how I’m gonna live without my Saturday mail), the plight of polar bears (apparently they’re going extinct), politics (who am I gonna vote for in 2020…wait 2015….201….in the next election, cause apparently CNN thinks I need to think about it now).

There is one thing that I think about more than others and it saddens me to my core.

There are so many people out there who will not realize how stinking funny I am.

I mean, there are sad souls out there who have never heard of me. How sad is that?

I can’t stand that thought. How can someone go throughout the day knowing what joke I have waiting for them? How can they go through their day without knowing how many times my children poop?!

I’m sorry to get so emotional – but this is such a touchy subject to me. People need to know how awesome I am.