Last night, I read through my old journal from 2001. I lived in New York, still at home. It was interesting to read. But one thing shocked me, I saw how I used to pray. It made me a little ashamed. My sweet husband tried to console me, telling me that in my past I was still searching for answers and that’s why I prayed like that. But it didn’t make me feel better. I mean, he’s right though. The things that I wrote in there shocked me at how misguided I was…but does that excuse my loss of fervency in my prayer?
My prayer life now actually has been slacking – I’m changing that. But this makes me think. Have I lost that fire in me? Or has it changed? I mean I still have the fire for ministry, and I pray (just not as much as I should)…but is that enough?